Super Random Parody with Halo and Metroid
by Admrl Washinton
Summary: The title speaks for it's self. Please R&R.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Halo or Metroid

A/N ok so this will start out as a one chapter piece of crap and might evolve into something else depending on popularity. Also so there is no confusion whenever a new line starts an entirely new something starts so there is no actual story line here.

* * *

Chapter 1

"I'm a firing a mediocre employee!" yelled the GF commander.

"Who might that be sir?" asked his assistant.

"Does Samus work for us?" asked the commander.

"Well I wouldn't say she completely works for us but we do pay her to do things for us," answered the assistant.

"Hmm close enough bring her in muwhahahahahaa," said the commander.

"I don't think Samus is mediocre," said the extremely confused man.

"What do you mean she is not mediocre she only defeated Ridly and her evil twin and the Space Pirates who knows how many times I'd call that mediocre if not less than," said the commander.

"What the hell do you mean that's mediocre she's like the only person in the universe besides of course Master Chief who could do that!" yelled the assistant.

"Hmmm who is this Master Chief that you speak of?" asked the commander.

"You know what I quit," said the very frustrated man.

* * *

"Oh dear god it's, it's ,it's, it's, it's!" screamed the running civilian.

"Will you stop fucking saying it's and tell us what it is already!" yelled the other civilian.

"It's a yaoi with Master Chief!" screamed the extremely terrified man.

"Ahhhhhh it's the end of the world run for your life!" screamed the other man.

"What the hell is going on here?" asked Samus who was just walking home from her date with the Chief.

"Oh thank god you're here someone made a yaoi with Master Chief ahhhhhh!" screamed another running civilian.

"Oh you've got to be fucking kidding me John is not mother fucking gay you sons of bitches whoever wrote it shall die!" yelled Samus as she started running in the opposite direction of the crowd of terrified people.

When Samus finally got to where the yaoi had come from it had already evolved in to a queen yaoi that was making more and more yaois with Master Chief. Samus then started firing her missiles and other super awesome weapons at the queen to try and destroy it. Then when Samus thought she wasn't going to be able to win the queen exploded. Da, da, da, da Master Chief had come to save the universe from the horrible Master Chief yaois.

* * *

"I shall light the rings and all who believe shall be saved!" yelled Truth.

"Uh that seems pretty unlikely," said a grunt.

"And why might that be?" asked Truth.

"Well for one Master Chief has never let anyone do it before and there's a red dot on your forehead which probably means that Master Chief is going to snipe you," answered the grunt.

"Oh shit," said Truth.

Bang!

"Oh yeah no scope know I can go back to making out with Samus," said the Chief as he walked away.

* * *

A/N: I know what you're thinking it was complete crap and if you think it was please be completely honest in your review and if enough people like it I might make another chapter.  
Semper fi


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Yay blah blah blah Ch. 2 ah who fucking cares just read the damn story.

Chapter 2

"This is the most boring job in the universe," sighed the Arbiter.

"No my job is the most boring job in the universe," said Master Chief.

"How could you have a more boring job we have the same fucking job," replied the Arbiter.

"Yeah well uh I guess you're right," sighed Master Chief.

"No my job is more boring," complained Spyro.

"No it isn't," yelled Master Chief and the Arbiter at the same time.

They then started shooting at Spyro but they didn't need to do to much shooting because Spyro died before their shots even reached him.

* * *

"Hey everyone look at me I'm riding pelican," yelled Samus.

"Ew that's gross who would do that to a pelican," Yelled the Arbiter in disgust.

"What is your problem I'm riding a pelican as in the drop ship," said Samus.

"Oh sorry," said the Arbiter.

"Yeah I men how could she be riding a pelican when I'm riding her," yelled Master Chief.

"Oh come on did I really need to know that," screamed the Arbiter.

"Yes, yes you did," replied Master Chief.

* * *

"La, La, La, La. La, La, La ,La, Ridley's world Ridley's world," sang Ridley. "Hi kids who should I kill today, Samus or Cortana?"

Bip, Bap, Bam. Master Chief shot at Ridley with his Battle Rifle doing no damage whatsoever. "Oh you think you going to stop me from killing them Master Chief?" asked Ridley.

"No I don't think I'll stop you I kow that I'll stop you," replied Master Chief.

"And just how will you stop me," asked Ridley.

"Like this, MASTER CHIEF POWERS ACTIVATE," said Master Chief.

Then everything went a bluish color but then It went to normal colors and what was left of Ridley was nothing. Then Cortana went rampant so Master Chief deleted her and then Samus had sex with Master Chief.

* * *

A/N: Love it hate just fucking review oh and the part with Spyro was a tribute to my #1 fan da da da da:Mended Dragon. Ya I know never heard of him to ha well anyway R&R

Semper fi


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Okay so this will be the last chapter. So yeah just read.

Chapter 3

"Hey, hey Arbiter check this out I just got Fallout 3 come look at my character," said Master Chief.

"No this looks like Half Life the character looks like Gordon Freeman," said the Arbiter.

"No this is Fallout 3 my characters name is John and he looks exactly like Gordon Freeman in every way possible," said the Chief.

"You named the character… after yourself… why" asked the Arbiter.

"Because there is this NPC named Sarah Lyons and her hair looks just like Samus' so I did it so I could have them make out," replied the Chief.

"You idiot you can't make out in Fallout," yelled the Arbiter.

"Oh yeah well then how are they doing it right now," said Master Chief.

"Wait, what how the hell did you do that?" asked the Arbiter.

"With my Master Chief powers of course," said the Chief.

"For the last time you don't have super powers!" screamed the Arbiter.

"Yes he does he used them to kill Ridley," said Samus.

"You know what fuck you guys," said the Arbiter as he walked away.

* * *

"Ha, ha I just ate 1,000 hot pockets, and drank 50 bottles of soda while watching every single Lord of the Rings movie…. 50 times, yay," squealed Truth.

Truth then got up to put away the movies when he felt that he needed to go to the bathroom. "I'll just take World of Warcraft to play while I go to the bathroom," said Truth to himself.

When Truth sat down on the toilet he began playing. Truth was a level 60 of course and was pwning all the level ones with his sword. But then. "I sense a disturbance in the force," said Truth.

It was kind of true. Truth had gotten diarrhea from all the hot pockets. But because of all the hot pockets (and because it's funny) the poop wouldn't come out. But Truth got an idea. "I bet Master Chief will help," said Truth.

So Truth called up Master Chief on his phone. The Chief agreed to help. When Master Chief got to Truth's cruiser but instead of helping Truth he killed him and went home to have sex with Samus.

* * *

"All right kids it is time for us to learn how babies are made," said Master Chief.

"Yay!" screamed all the children.

"Okay so when a Mommy and a Daddy love each other the Mommy sends Daddy on errands that will last him a few hours. Then Mommy calls over the 2nd daddy. Then Mommy and Daddy two have sex. Then nine months later the baby comes. But Daddy knows it isn't his. So Daddy gets a shotgun and kill Daddy two then the family lives happily ever after the end," explained Master Chief.

All of the children had their mouths hanging wide open and were scarred for life.

* * *

A/N So yeah the Chief's Fallout 3 character is acttualy mine. And don't start saying ah he stole Lord Mandalore's idea when Truth played World of Warcraft, no just no that was just showing how much I loved How the Coveanant Lost the War really go read it. So yeah when I have the time I'm going to make a story that is of course comedic but strictly in the Halo universe or something very close to it so yeah R&R.  
Semper fi


End file.
